If I Told You the Triathlon Would Kill Me, Good News - I'm Still Here!

Cue music. We are survivors, we didn't give up . . .

Gary and I (and my sister and brother-in-law) did a triathlon. The whole thing without stopping. And we're still alive! We signed up for it in May thinking it was an ingenious way to get in shape, my sister and I imagining our post-partum bodies turning into finely-chiseled masterpieces. At the time I could barely run two miles without trouble, and there's also the fact I can't swim. And also don't have a bike. No matter!

Gary and I both finished first in our age divisions . . . in transition time from bike to run. Gotta take my small victories. (The truth - it was probably because our bikes were parked close to the entrance. But still, my name is on top of a list.)

Due to a crazy summer (I always think I can do more than humanly possible. Maybe someday I will be right. My thought process usually goes like this, "Today I will refinance the house, make and deliver cookies to my visiting teaching people, clean the house, pack for our trip all by myself, and pick Gary up from work by 4. All with 3 small children underfoot.") What a diversion, yes, anyway, crazy summer, didn't get to train as much as I would have liked, so no amazing bod, but I went from struggling to run to finishing the sprint tri. Yeah.

Gary did well in the swim regardless of training, but barely knowing how to swim, it was hard for me. So, I made it through performing the backwards frog stroke. I was not the last one out of the water, but pretty close. The ones behind me were probably suffering from frog-kick to the head.

I was positive I'd make up time on the bike, but I just wasn't passing anybody. Finally I saw a lady in front of me that looked like she was going slow. Ha, ha, I was going to pass her! As I smugly sped past I noticed she didn't have a number on her bike. Also she was wearing a flowered t-shirt and a visor. And her hair had been recently set. Just out for a Saturday leisure ride . . . I am awesome. Later I found out if I'd been on a road bike I could have gone around 20% faster with the same amount of effort. My competitive side wants to borrow such a bike and try again. My calm side says it was all for the work out anyway, so it doesn't matter. My competitive side may someday win.

When I jumped off my bike, I almost fell down. Where were my legs? Oh, well, legs or no, I still had a 5k to run. Even though I was at the back of the pack, there's something about ditching your bike and running off to do a 5k that makes you feel like an athlete. Especially when you drink some water provided to you by a volunteer and then throw the cup to save time. That alone was sassy enough to help me find my legs. And also a short stretch once out of sight to spectators. The run was pretty hard, but I made up time there. Whereas I finished near the bottom of the first two events, I finished 11th out of 62 women on the run. Another teensy victory! Plus, I sprinted to the finish. A short sprint, but I did it.

I love hearing Gary tell about his race. I also love hearing Nate and Cindy tell about theirs. We all had some hard moments, but Cindy said it best, "Doing something like that is very empowering." We didn't think it would be that fun, especially since none of us are in the best shape. But Gary and I can't quit talking about it. About where we'll shave off time, and how much. I think a good start for me would be learning how to swim. We can see how people can get addicted to stuff like this. However, is most of the fun from the low expectations? Who knows. But jello-belly me did it. So we had biscuits and gravy for breakfast today. Can't just burn calories without replacing them. Right?

We look awesome in this picture - but it has to be posted. These people just swam 500 meters, biked 12 miles, and ran 3.1 miles . . . here's proof. (I have to brag, it's all this body's got!)

Other tri tips: Don't sleep with your two-year-old the night before. Remember to put your goggles on your actual eyes before the swim, on top of your head doesn't help much.

The Stuff These Boys Say . . .

Josh (In the middle of Sunday dinner): I said "breast milk" in Primary today.
Me: (Trying to hide my surprise, trying to keep a straight face): Oh really, why?
Josh: I thought it came from cows.
Me (Knowing they talked about being grateful for food today): So, did your teacher ask you what comes from cows?
Josh: Yes, and so I said "breast milk" and then they laughed. Hey, why are you guys laughing?
Gary: (Doing his Gary-giggle behind his napkin)
Both of Josh's teachers today were men. I very nearly got rice stuck up my nose from trying not to laugh/laughing.

Josh (after saying the breakfast prayer the other day): What if some time when I'm saying the prayer, I sing, "Pants on the Ground," to make Heavenly Father laugh?
(No, I don't think it's appropriate, and of course I told him so. But it was so funny that he was really trying think of Heavenly Father, and how he would probably like to laugh.)

Noah and I left for church last week before Gary and the other boys, so Noah never actually saw that Gary had come to church.
Noah's Nursery Teacher: Seems like you're stinky. Should we go find your mom or dad?
Noah: Yeah, let's go find my dad, he's at home.

It rained REALLY hard the other day, so we sat and watched it out our front door. Josh was trying to devise ways to get the mail without getting wet. Bucket on his head? Run fast?
Suddenly Noah says: Hey, I got a great idea! We can fly over the rain!
Me: That sounds pretty great, how would we do that?
Noah: . . . Um, not wings . . . a hang-glider. (and later on) Diego has a hang glider. (Yeah, it was from TV, but he hasn't watched it in a while, and I thought it was cute he went through the thought process.)
Oh, and Josh's bucket idea won, by the way. Pretty effective until he got to the mail box and turned it the other way to put the mail inside.

Update:Our Wooden Anniversary Amongst Life with Kidlets

I was thinking I didn't have much to report on the destruction front this week, but then we went and did something stupid called getting ready for church at the same time. Perfect opportunity to spray half a can of non-stick spray all over the kitchen, if you're Noah. He also got ahold of my mascara on Monday and made himself look like Kiss. Rock on, my child. (No, I don't know what that means, either.)


We didn't have a new baby this week like Allison and Ted, but we did get the rest of our children named. It took Josh a few minutes to nail it down, but now he's pretty sure we'll have 2 more boys and 2 girls, boys named Andrew and the girls named Solarica. He thought of Solarica a couple of months ago, and has not forgotten. I guess if it's meant to be . . . (And as Gary reported, at one point one of the girls was going to be Andrew, too.)

So the highlight of the week . . . well, there were several, so the first one - our anniversary! We got a babysitter ON the day of (this is a first, people), and went out to dinner. Thanks to restaurants.com we tried out an amazing new restaurant, and it was sooo yummy. We were laughing that we feel like experts just because of watching so much food network, but there we were, eating goat cheese and loving it. One of the things we ordered was bacon-wrapped pork medallions, and while we were eating I said, "This is what Allison would have gotten." After our dinner we stopped at the D.I. to try to look for a dresser again, and while we didn't find the perfect dresser, we did find a small table/desk thing that we want to refinish. We were excited because we think it will look cool, and were talking about the project. Gary said, "I'll have to buy you a sander for our anniversary." I asked him if he knew what the actual 5-year anniversary gift is supposed to be, and he said, "Wood. Happy anniversary." Perfect.

Other highlight - the temple on Friday night. I mention it because it was one of those things that almost didn't happen. We'd had a really busy week, I wasn't feeling the best, and I really wanted to reschedule. But thanks to a thought someone shared with me, we went, and it was amazing. I couldn't believe we almost didn't go, and felt that my perspective was changed for days from it. It's so awesome, if even for a minute, to feel like I had a grasp on what's really important. So, note to self: if you get the chance, just go. Will I listen to myself? Only time will tell.

And one more big highlight - seeing Sara, Taylor, Christian, Candacy, and families! My memory is fading, but I can tell you that we talked a lot, I was happy, I laughed, so, hmmm. Good stuff. I missed Martha, and was sad to not hear about the trek.

Josh just finished his two weeks of swimming lessons today, and he loved it. I spent most of the time chasing two others (Noah LOVES feeding the "duckses" at the lake), so I'm not sure what exactly Josh learned, but he likes to pretend he's an underwater superhero, so that's probably good. Just as long as he learns enough through the years to not have to resort to the backwards frog stroke to stay afloat, like this one lady I know too well (aaah, the triathalon is going to get me!). Andrew spent most of the swimming lesson time banging sticks into mud, which I thought was cute. I think it's funny to see him be a real kid. I've decided we need some really big rocks to climb on and some muddy places to dig in the back yard, and the kids will be set. Really.

Last week Josh and Noah found their whistles and went around with them around their necks pretending to be coaches. At one point Josh was giving pep talks to "all of the kids" as he stood on a piece of furniture. Noah is into substituting words of songs, for example, he started singing, "I like to scoop it, scoop it" (instead of move it, move it) as he scooped his yogurt. He also says "or something" a lot. E.g. "Is that my daddy on the phone or something?" and "If we want that we have to get a ladder or something."

And since it took me days to write this, it's the end of another week, and you probably want to know that while I was talking to the (relatively) new neighbor today, the boys ate all of the otter pops in the freezer (their "tummies were hurting"), and tried to make PB&J's, but broke the jam jar. With lots of jam in it. I'm proud of them for having initiative. :) Also, I got to visit some college friends the other day, and they totally made me want to move to Utah county to hang out. Pretty great friends! And Josh's big highlight was going to Magoon (Lagoon) with his cousins. He can't wait to be an adult now so he can go on the adult bumper cars.(His words.)

Okay, have a fantastic weekend!

Spiderman's Birthday

(Josh's birthday was almost 3 months ago, and I have been uploading pictures slowly ever since. It takes too long to do pictures these days. But I was determined to document at least big-deal things, like birthdays.)

Josh picked this picture for the front of his birthday party invitation - wouldn't you come?

Josh said he wanted a Spiderman birthday party, but when it came time to choose an invitation picture, he decided the more superheroes, the better. So, we decided it would be a superhero-kind-of-spiderman party. We turned the trampoline into a spider web, and the kids put the presents there.

The first activity was making capes. They colored with markers, glitter glue, and jewels (I was thinking for the girls, but they were over-all very popular, especially with Noah).

Here they are lined up at the fence for their relay race.

Here are the relay race instructions coming . . . pretty funny. The 6 year olds loved it, the 4 year old just kind of ran around. It was funny. Perfect that at that age they all considered themselves winners.

All gathered around the spider web - so cute. They thought the web was cool, and most kids took home a spider. However one little girl said, "Um, usually I don't play in spider webs."

I taped bad guys from Spiderman all over the fence, and gave each of the kids a can of silly string so they could shoot webs at them. They LOVED this, and wanted more when their cans were gone. It was hilarious, because they couldn't understand how to work the cans at first, and Gary had to help them, but even so, they couldn't get enough. Maybe it was Gary's "Let's really get these bad guys" narrative ("Dr. Octopus, you don't stand a chance with Cooper's web!"). Here Josh is demonstrating what it was like, using his spiderman-head squirt gun.

He also wanted to make sure I got a picture of him getting the bad guys with the new squirt gun he got from one of the little girls. Pretty awesome.

Here it is, the stuff kids' dreams are made of, coming true at last . . . blowing out the birthday candles!! (I had visions of an amazing cake I was going to make him, but ran out of time due to cutting out capes. So I put stickers on blue frosting. That's the sad part for me, but he thought it was incredible. I love kids. Also, we had Spiderman, Superman, and Batman pictures taped all over the tables.)

Hooray, Happy Birthday, Josh! The party was a ton of fun. Josh was so excited for it beforehand, it was unreal. He'd dance all around the house singing about, "Having a party with all my friends and cousins!" As we drove from house to house and I watched him proudly go up to the doors and give out his invitations, I teared up. I love seeing him so happy! I also love his imagination, and that such simple party activities could be such a wonderland for him.

I heard later that when he gave his invitation to his friend Kelty, she opened the door and Josh shoved an invitation at her and said, "You're coming to my party, Kelty."

As for Josh being 4, it's crazy because it's not that crazy. When my kids have had birthdays in the past I've said, "I can't believe he's __." But since we've had Andrew, it seems like Josh should be at least 4. He's done such a good job of being a good brother to Andrew, and is turning into the example for all of the kids. I was thinking lately how it's almost not fair how he has to be the first to show restraint, and to learn to act how he should, because if he does the others follow more easily. However, someone has to do it, and he is perfect for the job. He really is my buddy, the one who talks with me. I love his funny little mind, and I adore his billion-dollar smiles.

The party was on Saturday, but his actual birthday wasn't until Sunday. He started out the day with what we've started making a tradition, with opening his present from Grandma and Grandpa S.

Yep, Grandma knows what to get. I think this is some type of attack pose.

Josh loved getting sung to in Primary, and afterwards led me into the empty Primary room to show me where he stood during the song, and told me about how afterwards all of the kids prenteded he was a candle and blew him out. After dinner later that night, we led him into the garage to reveal one final present - the one  from Mom and Dad.

Do you think he likes it?

Update: Living the Rodeo Days Dream

Except for if I were really living the dream, I would be a Rodeo Queen. Sigh.

Anyway, the family update:
You people enjoy destruction, so I'll start with that. Josh turned his room into a "Star Wars library," so I made his a sign for his door, which I attached with masking tape. So, he kindly made a sign for the wall in my room, which he attached with glue. Noah broke my plastic container which holds the permanent markers, then drew on the piano and also a decoration I just painted for Andrew's room. Josh and Noah had a fun time putting every single blanket, sheet, pillow case, towel, wash cloth, and burp rag in the linen closet all over the upstairs (including wash cloths and burp rags in the bath tub). None of these things have been completely rectified at the time of this writing. It's just funny. I keep track so I'll know what their total tab is when I bill them.


We spent the weekend in Preston for "Rodeo Days." The kids loved the parade, and I got a lot of mileage out of "do ___ and you'll miss 5 minutes of the parade." Andrew was crazy about the horses, and kept laughing and slapping his hands when he saw them, it was adorable. Noah loved the horses, as well, and Josh and Noah couldn't quit eating candy. Yes, they throw candy at you, it's amazing. Josh got a blue cowboy hat that says, "Allred for governor" on it, and wore it constantly thereafter. On Friday night we got some babysitters for the kids (ooooh . . .) and went to the rodeo with my sister and husband, and other sister. The rodeo is always fun, the clowns are always "hilarious," and this was our first babysitter-for-date in way over a year, maybe two. Yee-haw! (My favorite line of the night: My Bro-in-law was remarking that Gary has all of the legislators in his blackberry, and asked Gary to produce the governor's phone number. Gary did, and then said, "I'm going to text him now, and tell him I'm at the rodeo." Then while making texting motions said, "I'm at the rodeo, LOL." I love the idea the governor receiving this text from Gary.)

On Saturday we floated the river with the kids. My sister and I were in a raft with the 3 youngest (babies w/grandma), and the other 5 in inner tubes. However, the inner tubes were apparently for smaller trucks than would have been ideal, and when Gary got in his, his tube and swimsuit sunk under the water, making it look as if he was sitting up naked in the river as he floated. Hilarity! Best lines from the kids, "Okay everybody, give me all your paddles," (Noah), "I see land!" (Josh), "When you see a wave, say, wave!" (Noah, who has watched excessive episodes of Diego) Hmmm, what else was funny . . . my sister flopping out of the raft after an oar? Don't know, but I was laughing most of the way down the river.

We also took some mini four-wheeler rides and horse-back rides with the kids that night. We told Josh he looked like Woody, and he was very proud. So when Noah went on his ride, he sang, "You've got a friend in me," the whole time. I've decided I like the country, it relaxes me. And also my parents' new hot tub relaxes me.

Hmm, so it's Wednesday, and I'll see some of you soon. We've already tried swimming in the lake for triathalon practice this week, and the good was it turns out I can kind of swim, bad news is for not very long. Kids loved it, though, and loved that we were swimming with the duckies and fishies. I'll try to take their attitude on that topic.

Have a great week. Or rest of week. If you pretend today is Monday your week will go really fast!